


One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

by louquorice



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Hope's Peak Academy (Dangan Ronpa), F/F, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Multi, Office AU, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-22
Updated: 2019-01-22
Packaged: 2019-10-14 11:28:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17507735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/louquorice/pseuds/louquorice
Summary: Akamatsu is far from giving up on life. If there’s anything she wants more in her life now, it wouldn’t be her former glory days, she just wants somethingdifferent.Office AU





	One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

**Author's Note:**

> i seem to notice that most fics of Kaerumi is that Tojo has the issues and it's Akamatsu that swoops in to be the guiding light (she seems to have that role in most ships she's in anyway)
> 
> and uh I came up with this!  
> I absolutely love the concept of a jaded Kaede lol  
> if she continued being the protagonist in canon, i really imagined a deconstruction of her optimistic personality

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> art (c) me
> 
> :D

There’s an expiry for being called ‘gifted.’ Akamatsu Kaede was a ‘prodigy’ as a child and ‘talented’ as a teenager, but now, a jaded mess barely pulling herself together after a talent burnout; just a part of millions of other skilled pianists. The sad part is that’s her only redeeming quality, and she doesn’t even stand out for it anymore.

It started in college where she took up a music degree. She was one of the stand outs, but the thing with her is she was only ever good with the piano, an instrument barely relevant in their curriculum (which she found absurd). Her mastery of classical music barely turned heads either. She found herself quickly drowned out from the sea of other talented musicians, those more flexible with other instruments. It wasn’t a big deal at first, because Akamatsu played piano to make people smile, not impress them. But then people stopped smiling; her professors were becoming evidently frustrated with her one-track “talent,” her recitals barely had an audience (“classical music is boring,” they would say), and her parent’s smiles would falter when she started slipping from first place during contests, until she didn’t win anything at all.

It finally hits her during her Junior year, where she’s tired and almost repulsed of playing the piano everyday in her life, that making people smile and impressing them might not be mutually exclusive after all. So she takes a step back and shies away from the spotlight, focusing more on passing than doing her best, and graduates like any other ordinary person—barely remembered, no recognition.

She’s not sure how it happened, but Saihara Shuichi, her bestfriend from high school, managed to rope her into getting an office job with him when he returned from abroad. It was a much more mundane setup, a far cry from the future their idealistic teenage selves envisioned them to have. They were sitting on the rooftop of Saihara’s house then, anticipating a meteor shower. Saihara had gushed about much he wanted to be a detective, and planned to set up his own detective agency. He had been an apprentice to his uncle in his firm, and with enough encouragement, he had the confidence to step up. Akamatsu, on the other hand, wanted to be a composer, and create scores for movies, plays and musicals, and conduct her own orchestra. In another life, maybe this would have worked out… for Saihara suddenly shifted to a business degree from Criminal Law after solving his first amateur case (he would never say why), while Akamatsu has become disillusioned by her talent, and now they’re both working in a small accounting firm, living life in monotony.

Akamatsu was obviously not equipped for an office job like this, especially dealing with accounting, but someone has to fax papers, organize folders and assist the elderly secretary, Gekkogahara Miaya, with the computerized tasks—basically a glorified assistant secretary. And if the secretary is not around, she’s the office intern that makes coffee for everyone. It’s a routine job, and a very boring one, but the pay was enough for her to get by.

“Kaede,” Saihara swivels his chair around to face her, and hands out a stack of papers, “could you photocopy these for me? One per page.”

It’s the moment she realized she had spaced out. It’s been a slow day for her, since Gekkogahara was absent. “Yeah, sure,” she says, taking the papers off his hand as she stands up.

Passing by Momota Kaito’s desk, he also gets her attention, waving a handful of papers. “Hey Akamatsu, these ones too!” Momota was even more out of place in this office. He had a muscular build, and a far too charismatic personality for a desk job. Unlike her, who kept her degree a secret other than Saihara and the HR officer knowing, Momota had boldly proclaimed he took a degree in Physical Science so he could become an astronaut. How he ended up here was still a mystery to all.

“Mhm, no problem,” Akamatsu says, stretching out her free hand.

Momota was about to hand her the papers when Harukawa Maki, the girl across from his desk coughed loudly. Akamatsu turns to look at her, and Harukawa was glaring at Momota. Confused, she looks at the guy again, the papers now placed on her palm. He gives her a sheepish grin, “Please. Oh, and two copies each.” _Right, Harukawa is like, his mom or something…_

Akamatsu merely hums in response, then makes her way to the office copy machine to complete her task. It was located at the back of the office, near the break room.

Plugging in the machine, it takes about four presses on the power button for it to fully start up. The machine was worn out, bits of old tape plastered around, and it was missing a leg, only propped up by stacked up carton. It was not… _up to date_. Shirogane Tsumugi, their boss, was adamant about not getting a replacement yet since it was still fully functional, though Akamatsu muses she’s just stingy. She sets about prepping the machine, loading paper in the tray and tries to print out a copy as a test. The machine turns off instead. She huffs in exasperation.

Turning it on again, she prints out another test paper and this time the paper jams. Akamatsu releases a frustrated groan. _Of course, I never expected my life to be easy._

“Need some help, Akamatsu-san?” Chabashira Tenko, the building’s tinkerer and janitor, approached her. She was mopping the break room floor when she apparently heard her struggles. A sweet girl all in all, very bubbly and energetic, it reminds Akamatsu so much of her former self.

“Uh, yeah.” Akamatsu scratches her cheek. “Thanks, Chabashira-san.”

Chabashira waves her off and kneels in front of the machine, inspecting the paper feed. She removes a panel from the side of the copier, exposing its inner machinations. “I don’t see why they haven’t replaced this hunk of junk yet.” Ripping out the jammed paper from one of the rollers, she takes out a wrench from her back pocket and makes some adjustments.

“It’s not junk yet, for Shirogane-san at least,” Akamatsu whispers.

Chabashira chuckles lightly. Standing up, she pats the machine. “This needs some oil to keep the cogs turning.”

“I’ll be sure to tell the boss.” Akamatsu smiles. “Thanks again, Chabashira-san.” The girl gives her a salute, and walks off.

Just then, Shirogane strides out of her private office, calling for everyone’s attention. There is a stretch of silence as all heads turn to her. She looked solemn. “It pains me to say that Gekkogahara-san won’t be coming to the office anymore,” she says.

“You fired her?” Ouma Kokichi says, leaning into his chair.

Unfazed by the disruption, Shirogane continues. “She died of a heart attack earlier this morning.”

Ouma, despite his tactless and insensitive behavior, had the decency to look embarrassed of what he just did.

“We will schedule a visit to her wake as soon as possible. For now, get back to work.” Shirogane promptly returns to her office.

It’s no surprise that the news quickly turns everyone into disarray. Momota expresses his disbelief, Chabashira laments the loss of the sweet, old woman, and Saihara actually cries. Akamatsu is saddened of the news, though it wasn’t outwardly obvious given that she’s back on her task almost immediately.

“Well, you know what that means!” Ouma chirps. “Someone will get a promotion!”

“You insensitive prick!” Momota throws a crumpled piece of paper at him.

“Hey, don’t make a mess, you m—man,” Chabashira says.

Ouma shrugs, spinning around his swivel chair. “But it’s the truth,” he pauses, “though, if anyone is getting a promotion… it would be Akamatsu-chan.”

Akamatsu freezes at the mention of her name. Of course she would be the likely one, since she basically played assistant secretary for over a year. Most people would be elated at the prospect of promotion, but she dreads that. Not only is she not qualified, she’ll be put above her peers and be expected to deliver to expectations. _Again_. She can’t have that, not again. She forces out a laugh as she gingerly compiles the photocopied pages on one side. “Don’t be ridiculous, Ouma-kun.”

Momota shoots her a perplexed look. “Dude, shouldn’t you be happy or somethin’?”

“For what? Happy that someone died so I can have their job?”

His face falls. “When you put it that way…”

“Besides, I’m not qualified.”

Ouma snorts. “You don’t need a business degree to be a secretary. You just have to keep everything in order.” For all his snark and teasing, he is surprisingly encouraging.

Akamatsu turns away, keeping her gaze focused on the machine. “You need initiative to be effective for that. I’m only good at following orders.” She releases a breathy sigh. “Now enough about me, one of you is clearly getting that promotion.” The office stays silent, only the sound of the rickety, old copy machine grinding out paper could be heard.

—

Every night, Akamatsu walks five blocks to the apartment she shares with her twin sister, Shikimi. ‘Share’ is a loose term because while they do split the rent, her sister mostly stays with her boyfriend, and visits her mostly on weekends. As such, she expects to arrive in an empty apartment and is pleasantly surprised when that wasn’t the case.

“Kaede, welcome home!” Shikimi practically flies toward her the moment she opens the door, and gives her a bear hug.

“Hm, yeah, I’m back.” Akamatsu hugs her back. Despite the drastic difference in their personal lives now, she’s always happy to see her sister.

Her sister releases her from the hug. “Did you have dinner yet?”

Akamatsu shakes her head. “Have you? There’s ramen in the—“

“Seriously, sis. When was the last time you had a proper meal?” Shikimi places her hands on her hips. The fact that she used to do that pose, and the fact both of them look alike, unnerves her. Constant reminders of who she used to be, it’s sickening and comforting at the same time.

She averts her gaze. “Uh, I fried some eggs earlier?”

“Jeez.” Shikimi shakes her head. “Well, it’s good you haven’t had dinner yet. We’re going out.”

Akamatsu scoffs. “Sis, I just returned from _outside_.”

“That’s too bad, because if you checked your phone like you should… or atleast turned it off silent, then you would know I wanted you to meet up with me and Taro at Zoroku Yuzan.”

She gives her an incredulous look. “You’re seriously asking me to third wheel with you and Amami? Sis… how could you.”

“Stop being dramatic.” Shikimi rolls her eyes, then hooks her arm to hers. “Let’s go, he’s waiting for us.”

“I’m still in my office uniform.”

“Good. You look dressed up that way. I know you’ll just slip into your baggy sweatpants and put on a loose t-shirt if I gave you a chance to change.”

—

They take a cab to Roppongi, the whole ride was in silence. Shikimi would insist in paying since she very well knew she was the bigger earner between the two of them, and naturally because she pities her—a sorry excuse of an older sister. Shikimi could very well just leave her in the dust and soar for greater heights, and she really should. Their parents have, it’s only a matter of time til she’s fed up too. She can’t even feel the urge to cry with that thought anymore.

“Hey, we’re here.” Her sister nudges her gently. She was already out the car. _Spaced out again..._

She trudges out of the cab, immediately greeted by the sight of her sister and her boyfriend having a conversation, laughing. “I really shouldn’t be here,” she mutters under her breath, considering hailing a cab again.

“Wassup Kaede,” Amami says, holding out a fist.

“Hey Amami.” She bumps her fist with his. He frowns.

“Aww, I thought we’re first name basis already.”

Akamatsu puts both hands in her skirt pockets. “It’s weird, I’m your girlfriend’s twin and…”

“Well, I’ll still keep keep calling you by first name. I don’t want you both to be confused by ‘Akamatsu.’”

“You call my sister ‘Honey Angel,’ I’m pretty sure she won’t respond to her last name.”

“Ssshh, Kaede!” Shikimi slaps her arm. They all laugh—even her laugh was genuine.

Amami drapes an arm around her sister, then makes a motion to go. “Let’s get going, shall we?” Akamatsu wordlessly follows behind them as they enter the shop.

—

The meal passed with mostly her two companions ignoring her, and Akamatsu doesn’t mind. She’s basically freeloading from her sister anyway, so she sits there in silence, drumming her fingers absentmindedly on the countertop, as the two lovebirds share sweet nothings to each other as they empty their plates. The way she taps her fingers though, there was a certain rhythm to them, almost as if she’s playing the p— She abruptly pulls her hand away from the counter as if burned.

“So Kaede, how you doin’?”

Akamatsu turns to look at the couple, surprised at the sudden attention. Amami looking at her expectantly while her sister looked… apologetic. _Did she see what I was doing?_ She takes a deep breath to steel her nerves. “Oh, y’know, the usual.”

“Still in the accounting firm?”

There was no malice to his question, but she can’t help but feel a bit defensive. She hates it when people tread down that line, that thin line of _what she could have been_. “Should I not be?” She tries to bite down the snark.

“Kaede…” Shikimi starts. And she knows that tone, it’s the tip of a reprimand. She keeps herself calm down.

“Sorry,” she whispers. “It’s been a stressful day. Someone from the office died…”

“It’s okay, I’m sorry, too. Don’t mean to… uh.” Amami struggles with his apology and she catches a glimpse of Shikimi subtly elbowing him. Instead, he finishes with “Okay, I’ll drive both of you home.”

Akamatsu raises an eyebrow at him. “Now? You know, I don’t mind going back to the apartment first. I understand both of you would want to spend more time with each other.”

“Actually, I have to be early to a shoot tomorrow and the location is nearer to ours than his,” Shikimi says. She doubts that’s the real reason, getting up early and going to distant shoot locations was never a problem for her sister, whether she was in their apartment or at Amami’s.

She shrugs, and they all promptly leave the establishment. The trip back to their apartment was in awkward silence.

—

“Kaede, we need to talk,” Shikimi says the moment their apartment door closes. She expected that.

Akamatsu clicks her tongue. She throws her coat on the counter before turning to face her sister. “About what? About my job again? I can manage to pay the full rent if that’s wh—”

“I don’t mean that. That was never the problem.” Her sister points a finger at her. “You… you can’t keep doing this to yourself.”

“Doing what, exactly? I have a job, a place to stay in and I eat three times a day. What am I doing wrong, Shikimi? Tell me what.” Akamatsu collapses herself on a chair.

Shikimi looks down. “Nothing, really.”

“Then I don’t see what’s the problem. I don’t see the point of you always bringing up—“

“I’m scared!” Tears were welling on her sister’s eyes. Wait, she shouldn’t be crying. _Oh Kami, this is new_. “Because I’m scared, Kaede.”

“Scared of what?” She honestly doesn’t know what she’s talking about.

“Every time I see you… Pieces of you just keep falling off. I barely know y-you anymore. I’m already losing you while you’re still alive.” Shikimi desperately wipes away the tears from her eyes, but more keep falling. “I’m scared I’ll lose you for real.”

Akamatsu gets out of the chair and approaches her sobbing sister. Shikimi has always been the emotional one. She wraps her arms around her, rubbing circles on her back. “Oh, sis… I’m not giving up on life. Just because I’m someone ordinary now doesn’t mean I’m not content on living.”

Her sister doesn’t stop crying though, so she leads her to their bed and encourages her to sleep it off, reminding her of her early shoot the next day. She slips out of the room not long after Shikimi relaxes in bed.

Akamatsu knows how unfeeling she seems right now, but it’s only because she doesn’t really know how to handle this. It’s not going to be their last argument about it, but this one was the first time it went how it did. Usually, Shikimi would just yell empty platitudes at her then shut herself in their room, then she’d apologize the next day by making her breakfast.

She goes out to their mini terrace, a suspended platform twenty storeys above the ground, and looks down. She can make out an outline of the streets illuminated by street lights, cars passing to and fro and tiny civilians walking about. There was no urge to jump, actually. Akamatsu shifts her gaze to the skyline beyond. Tall buildings dotted by specks of light with a backdrop of a dark, moonless sky. She sighs, deep and tired.

Akamatsu is far from giving up on life. She really meant what she said to her sister. If there’s anything she wants more in her life now, it wouldn’t be her former glory days, she just wants something _different_.

The next day, she wakes up to the smell of sausages wafting through the apartment. She had fallen asleep in their pseudo-living room, one that was directly connected to the kitchen.

“Morning, sis!”

“Mhm.” Akamatsu rubs the sleep off her eyes. “What time is it?”

“9:20.”

She yawns. _Wait. WHAT?_ “It’s past nine? Shikimi I thought you had an early shoot?” Akamatsu scrambles out of the sofa, making a beeline for the bathroom.

“Yeah. 10:30 is an early shoot…”

“Ugh. Artists, I swear to god." She splashes water on her face, then quickly brushes her teeth.

“I’ll prepare your lunch for you!”

—

It was 10:10 by the time she reaches the office. She had to begrudgingly take a cab (with her own money, of course) so that she won’t be tardy than she already is. Making one last finger comb, she slinks into their office hoping that Shirogane wouldn’t catch her. From the door, she could see everyone... working. Like, actually _working_ , even Ouma. It's an odd sight to say the least.

Slipping past the break room, an unfamiliar voice says, “And who might this be?” Akamatsu stops dead in her tracks, wincing. She slowly turns to face the source of the voice.

“Uh, she’s Akamatsu Kaede. The… assistant secretary,” Saihara says.

“That’s not really my—“

A tall, imposing woman stands before her. “I do hope you don’t make tardiness a habit, Akamatsu-san. I greatly prefer if my assistants don’t slack off.” The woman walks past her, heels clicking on the floor as she strides toward Shirogane’s office.

When she hears the sound of the door closing shut behind her, Akamatsu releases a breath she didn’t know she was holding. “What the hell.” She turns to Saihara. “Who was that?”

Saihara scratches the back of his head. “Tojo Kirumi, our new secretary.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hhhh i dont really know where im going with this lol  
> also i have a confession, idk how to properly write fluff  
> and if i do write fluff, there will always be angst bleeding through
> 
> also, to the four people that follow my work, thank you ily  
> comments and kudos appreciated~
> 
> **also yeah, Shikimi is the name I gave Kaede's twin, I also use that in my HPA AU~


End file.
